“It seems that I have left the noblest part of myself back there…”
Can we talk about the possessive language here? There are a million other lines that could have been used. Things like, “I owe it to him,” “I have to do this,” or “I have a responsibility.” These are all strong, active-voice sentences with a good dramatic effect. They carry overtones of honor and camaraderie, and communicate the idea that brothers-in-arm earn each others’ loyalty and sacrifice.
But Kirk doesn’t say anything to that effect. He uses a more passive sentence construction: “It’s my responsibility.” That seems incongruous, doesn’t it?
The difference is that “I have a responsibility” could apply to lots of people. It’s non-exclusive. Every member of the Enterprise bridge crew might reasonably say they have a responsibility (one of morality, friendship, loyalty, etc) to Spock. Kirk’s responsibility isn’t like that—it’s unique and exclusive. Hence the otherwise weak sentence construction of “it’s my responsibility,” which allows him to use “my” instead of “a”.
This is weird. Admiral Morrow sure thinks so. He reacts right off the bat to the word “my”, countering with a surprised, “yours?!” This is a Starfleet admiral; he knows as well as anyone about the bonds that form between colleagues in dangerous situations. It doesn’t surprise him that Kirk wants to go back for Spock, per se. What surprises him is that Kirk has just claimed sole and exclusive responsibility for Spock’s soul.
To illustrate. Consider the sentence, “I have a responsibility to X.” How many people in your life could X reasonably be? Personally, it could work for most of my friends and family, or even people I don’t know to whom I have some sort of moral responsibility.
What about, “I’m responsible for X”? That narrows it a lot; I might be held directly responsible for an immediate family member or a very close friend, but it’s a little strong for anyone outside that sphere.
Finally, consider “X is my responsibility.” That is super specific. I can only think of one, maybe two people to whom that applies—people to whom my obligations outweigh anyone else’s. And that’s the kind of person Spock is to Kirk. When it comes right down to it, it’s not Sarek, Amanda, Vulcan, Starfleet, or any other member of the Enterprise crew who ultimately answers for Spock’s fate. It’s Kirk.
And he knows it.
I see a lot of meta about “as surely as if it were my very own”, “better part of myself”, and “the cost would have been my soul”—all of which are fantastic lines in their own right. But in my opinion, none of them are as important as that one little “my”, framed by Admiral Morrow’s reaction. Up to this point in the movie we’ve seen only Kirk’s grief, which is natural, expected, and understandable to all those around him. But suddenly, in this scene, we’re talking about something new. Something beyond grief, bone-deep, extraordinary—something Morrow just can’t understand, because he isn’t living it.
